Oh, hi. Thanks for taking a break from your yummy cuticles and hangnails snack!
If feeling left out of fun party games like hand charades hasn’t stopped you from biting your nails, maybe this news will: The American Psychiatric Association recently categorized nail biting in the “pathological grooming” category of obsessive compulsive disorder. Is that making you bite your nails even more?!
Unless your fingernails taste like bacon, you’ve probably tried or wanted to stop. I myself enjoyed 20 or so long, delicious years of nail chewing before I finally broke the habit. Quitting is totally doable. The trick is to apply your obsessive-compulsive tendencies to fixing your nails instead of biting them. Here’s how I did it and how you can, too:
Identify Your Triggers: As a kid, I bit my nails when I felt anxious in a social situation. Play the VHS tape of my third-grade holiday play, and you can watch me hunched over and frightened with my hands in my mouth for almost a full hour. In later years, I just chewed whenever someone spoke to me or looked like they might. But now iPhones can handily solve that problem! At potentially awkward parties, pretend to check your email or go through your contacts and change your ex-boyfriends’ names into that turd emoji. Or if you bite your nails when you’re stressed at work meetings, draw doodles of your boss fighting a giant turkey in your notebook. It’s a great way to discover your hidden artistic talent.
Give Yourself Tough Love: Read the Wikipedia page for nail biting. Think of all the germs you’re noshing on! Remember that guy on the subway with no pants and a phlegmy cough? You’re pretty much eating him. Have a mean friend take a candid photo of you when you’re chomping away. Have you seen yourself? Even the most swag lady looks like a hyena eating its own young when she’s biting her nails.